The Abridgd Series Stories
by Michaela-chan
Summary: This is actually Ch. 2, Ch. 1 is under Georgie-chan's name. The series will be continuing under this now.


**Hey there! So, as you should know, I've created my own account and don't share with my sister's anymore. The other abridged series (under Georgie-chan) were written by me, but will now be under my penname. Enjoy! ; ) Oh yeah, and sorry it's so late.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Naruto anime or the Naruto Abridged Series (created by MasakoX and Vegeta3986)**

The Abridged Series Stories

Ch. 2- Becoming a Ninja!

A beautiful sunny day in Konoha. A wonderful day for a walk. Naruto put on his shoes and opened the door with a large yawn. Time to wake the body up!

Naruto headed down the road, soaking up the sunshine, taking in the scenery, when he saw Konohamaru strolling down from the opposite direction. Naruto shoved his hands in his pockets. Why, on a beautiful day like this, did the first person that he saw have to be Konohamaru? After a slight pause, Naruto closed the distance between himself and the Hokage's grandson.

"Hey Konohamaru!" Naruto said, his faux smile in place

"Hey Naruto," replied the boys, always pleased to see his model and friendly rival.

They looked at each other, awkwardness filling the air.

"Wow," Naruto said, crossing his arms, "this chapter's really boring, isn't it?"

Konohamaru sighed. "Yeah, pretty much."

Naruto's face lit with one of his 'great' ideas.

"I know! Why don't we just skip to the part of the episode that everyone wants to see…"

"Hhhh! You mean-"

"Yep! Soft-core porn," a smug smile spreading on Naruto's face.

_O_o Umm… Naruto?_

…

_Naruto!_

"Heh! Nice."

**********

"I've changed my mind Naruto," the angry-faced boy called, "put my chapter back in!"

Impatience and want coated Kono's voice.

Naruto looked at the boy like he was crazy.

"Geez, it's too late for that," Naruto replied. He'd finally figured out what Konohamaru wanted.

Konohamaru was disheartened, and with this disheartenment came clumsiness. As he tried to progress towards Naruto… He fell…

"Aww…"

**********

Sakura, on her way to the academy, saw her old childhood friend (now, for no real reason, enemy) coming out of a building. Sakura braced herself for the insults that both girls would bombard each other with. This, sad to say, was a ritual of theirs.

"Hey Sakura," Ino said, greeting the pink-haired rival with a voice so covered in sarcasm you could almost taste it.

"Hey Ino," Sakura replied coolly.

"So," Ino asked with a smile, "how's being a violent bitch going for ya?"

Sakura didn't even flinch. Instead she replied steadily.

"About the same as your vision with no pupils."

This triggered the competitive side in each girl, and both started sprinting toward the academy. Neither could overtake the other.

"Flat-chest!" Ino shouted.

"Poser!" Sakura yelled back.

Insults were thrown back and forth, all the way to the academy.

When they finally got there, together, they were both dead on their feet.

"Ha," Ino puffed, "I won."

Sakura looked disgusted at even the thought of that!

"No way, I did!"

In an attempt to prove that SHE was most definitely first, Sakura called for the other students to vote.

"Hey everyone!" addressed Sakura, "Who won?"

Sakura was full of confidence, even a little smug. This, however, wasn't long lived.

"Ino."  
"Ino!"

"Ino."

"Ino."

"Ino!!!"

Sakura shrunk slightly. Ino looked around the room, then strutted to her seat.

"Aw, who asked you?!" Sakura replied, embarrassed.

**********

'Man,' thought Naruto, 'why does Sasuke get all the girls.' Naruto sat at his seat, head in his hands, his lips pursed. 'I'm the main character!'

_Daiyou sex makinage!!!_

Naruto fell onto Sasuke.

_Nope, not today fan girls! You know who you are._

"If you girls can all stop squealing and complaining for a minute, we're gonna put you all into trios," Iruka said, wide-eyed, addressing his class.

"Why trios?" one snotty nosed kid asked.

"Because you touch yourself at night," Iruka replied. Really, he has no idea why. Do his students always have to be so damn alert?!?

"Okay Naruto you're with Sakura-"Naruto punched the air.

"Oh f***," Sakura groaned.

"-and… emo freak!" Iruka announced. This time, Sakura was joyful.

"Aw snap…" Naruto frowned.

Sakura was still enjoying her good news.

"Good things DO happen to bad people!

A quiet girl standing by herself twiddling her finger looked dismayed. She would not be having her love on her team to… er… talk to… yeah… that's what she wanted to do.

"Aw, I wanted to see Naruto naked." Hinata mumbled quietly to herself, thought not as quiet as she thought.

"Hinata!" Iruka called out. Hinata quickly snapped out of her thoughts. "Stop fantasizing about Naruto being naked!"

The class shuffled as gross pictures entered their heads. Hinata tilted her head and blushed.

"Just for that, you're with the dog guy-"The boy, Kiba, smiled. "-and the bug guy!" Iruka finished.

Shino pushed his glasses back into position.

"I like bugs…." he said.

Iruka shivered. He thought there was nothing worse than bugs.

"Yes, yes, we know already!"

"I don't get it," Shikamaru, the smartest student, queried, "why do the anime girls always like the emo guys who treat them like crap?" He glanced from Ino, to Sasuke, back to Ino, raising his eyebrows.

"Hey, don't blame me, blame the writing staff!"

Shikamaru rolled his eyes.

"If it were up to me, I'd be going out with Kiba."

'Mmm…'she thought, drifting off day-dreaming, 'Kiba….'

"Ino," Iruka said, "who, by the way, is far superior to Sakura in every way," he mumbled. "You're paired with Shikamaru and… de… g… umm…" Iruka didn't think Ino would take this news too well.

"…er… that fat guy!" Iruka finally spat it out. Ino hit her head in her hands and leant on the table, giving out a slight groan.

The 'fat guy' was too busy eating chips to notice Ino's disappointment. Both Shikamaru and Ino continued staring at Choji, speechless. How could someone as _superior_ as them be stuck with a guy like that? If looks could kill, Iruka would've been dead within seconds.

"And," Iruka referred to his list, "that's everyone that matters."

He smiled at his students gleefully.

"What about us?" one boy to his right asked.

This dampened Iruka's spirits. His hands dropped to his sides, the paper slapping his leg, his face trying to keep the frustration under control.

"You're not important enough," he replied.

"My mum thinks I'm special," the child called out.

"Yeah, well, your mum's a skank," Iruka retorted. He may be a sensei, but that doesn't mean he doesn't have childish ways.

"At least I have a mum!" the boy yelled back, then poked his tongue out.

Iruka knew he was beat.

"Ah, touché." Yep. Beat.

**********

When class had finished, Sakura, who was unable to convince Sasuke to walk with her, wanted to just get home and figure out her plan of attack (not literally, but how to get Sasuke to fall for her). Naruto was out of the classroom close after Sakura. And, seeing as she was alone, this was the perfect chance to talk to her.

Sakura, hoping to just stay unnoticed by Naruto, walked faster and looked straight ahead. Naruto jogged up to her, waved, and called out her name. Sakura stopped in her tracks. Damn! She flung her clenched fists open and tried to act calm.

"Hey Sakura, I was wondering if you'd go on a date with me. I'd be really nice to you, treat you like a human being, give you gifts and love you every day!"

Naruto waited, smiling, for Sakura's reply.

She just sighed. He still waited.

She rolled her eyes. Obviously he wasn't going to take the hint.

"Oh please, affection is so last year. All girls care about are the emo guys who treat you like you don't exist," she said this as though it was the most obvious thing in the world.

Naruto stood absolutely still, completely puzzled.

Sakura put her hands on her hips and ordered Naruto to watch. Sasuke was coming up behind Naruto, so Sakura thought she'd demonstrate. She smoothed her dress and hair.

"Heey Sasuke!" she said, her hands clasped together in front of her.

"Go away…" Sasuke replied while walking right past the pink-haired girl.

"He's so dreamy!" Sakura squealed.

Naruto walked over to join Sakura.

"That… doesn't make any sense…" Naruto was still trying to figure it out as Sakura left.

**********

_The Next Day…_

Naruto, in an attempt to understand Sakura's talk the other day, paid a _visit_ to Sasuke.

Naruto hummed the Mission Impossible theme to himself while trying to clamber over the roof-top and into the room Sasuke was in.

"Aleeyoop!" he called out as he leapt over the window sill, knocking an oblivious Sasuke over.

Naruto caught Sasuke by surprise, meaning Sasuke was unable to defend himself!

"Ahh, that's not suppose to bend that way… Ahh, my spine…"

After all the kerfuffle, Sasuke managed to tie Naruto up on the ground. Not even a scratch scathed his pale face.

"Well, that was anti-climactic."

**********

Sakura was out pondering her thought after the other day's dismissal from Sasuke. Her face was sullen, her shoulders drooping.

"Why doesn't Sasuke like me," she asked herself, "I'm only a horrid bitch 99% of the time."

Sasuke, out on his walk after winning against Naruto, noticed Sakura, and overheard her self-talk.

"What are you the other one percent of the time?"

Sakura, dragged back from pondering, looked up to see what she found to be a pleasant surprise.

"A leprechaun!!!" she replied, her surprise embarrassingly evident in her reply.

Sasuke blinked, his eyes wide; a leprechaun?

"Yeesh," he said while walking over to Sakura, "sorry I asked."

Sakura gave a slight smile, putting her hair behind her ear.

"So…" she said, working up her courage, "You wanna kiss?" On this last word she made eye contact and leant ever so slightly toward the pale skinned Uchiha.

Sasuke freaked.

"Sorry, my heart belongs to Ino. I don't like the whole pupils thing." And with that, he ran off clinging to his stomach and shivering.

"Bleurgh!"

Sakura was, once again, discarded by Sasuke.

**********

_Back in Sasuke's room…_

"Wait a minute, how did I end up being tied up?" Sasuke grimaced, squirming on the floor.

"Oh yeah, I didn't tie up Naruto, I tied up a log. I ALWAYS get those two confused!"

When Sasuke finally got himself free, he went for a walk to blow off some steam.

"Stupid, tie me up off-screen –" he mumbled to himself.

Sakura was sitting on the bench. She thought Sasuke was returning and had prepared a short speech to declare her feelings.

"Sasuke! My love for you – "

"Not interested," he replied, as though she were trying to sell him something.

"But I just – " Sakura tried again.

"Nope."

"Maybe if – "

"Uh-uh."

Sasuke decided to try a new approach; using more than two words!

"Why don't you try going out with Naruto?" he asked, glancing back over his shoulder.

"But he's not emo, even though he doesn't have parents. He doesn't know any better." She went on as though Naruto were three years old. "When you lose your parents you're supposed to be an emotional wreck, like you!"

Sakura thought this was a great compliment.

Sasuke frowned at her.

"Hey Sakura, I have this great technique where I can shove your foot in your mouth. Oh wait, you seem to have already done that for me."

"Wh-what do you mean Sasuke?" Sakura asked.

"Sakura," he said, "I'm about to say to you what Naruto fans have wanted to say to you for the longest time… Shut…"

Sakura's eyes widened.

"…the hell up… you fuzz-bag."

Everything went quiet. Both stood perfectly still; Sasuke, his head inclined as he waited for his words to sink in, and Sakura, shocked into silence.

Sasuke turned to face the girl.

"Ok, I made that last part up."

**********

_It was inspection day for Naruto, so the Hokage and a man called Kakashi were the 'inspectors'. Really, they were just snooping._

"_Kakashi," ordered the Hokage, "we need to end on something funny. Pick up that milk!"_

_Kakashi took this order to be a great privilege. Why, you ask? Well… It's Kakashi… O_o_

"_Yes sir!"_

_He looked at the carton and smiled._

"_Heh heh, it has a picture of a cow on it. Heh heh heh, MOO!_

_The Hokage smiled on, proudly._

"_Heh heh heh heh heh, MOOO…" Kakashi shook the carton. "Dance cow, dance!"_


End file.
